“…..if therefore thine eye be single, thy whole body shall be full of light…… let your eyes look straight ahead, and your eyelids look right before you. Ponder the path of your feet, and let all your ways be established. Do not turn to the right or the left ………”
MY FRIENDS CALL ME SINGLE
My friends call me single – and oh how true!
In all that I am, in all that I do,
I’m single in vision, in purpose and plan,
I’m living this season to the fullest I can.
My friends call me single, they’ve sure hit the mark,
My light’s ever shining, ever-glowing in the dark.
I’m singly living God’s purpose and Word,
Without distraction I’m serving the Lord.
My friends call me single – I have no care.
I’m running to win – no time to spare!
Pressing on for the goal of the heavenly prize,
I’m a pearl of great value in my loving Savior’s eyes.
So I celebrate “single” – I relish the times!
Making the most of each moment as the clock of life chimes
I’m redeeming times and seasons – not one wasted hour
As I fulfill my destiny through God’s glorious power!
©Grace D. Gana, May 2020
(A Poem Based on Matt 6:22 {KJV}, Prov 4:25-27, Matt 5:16-18, 1 Cor 7:32a, 1 Cor 9:24, Heb 12:1, Phil 3:14, Is 54:11-12; 62:3, Eph 5:16, 1 Pet 1:4-5)
I wrote this poem several years ago and as of the time of this post, I am still single – a tragedy in the eyes of some and anomaly in the eyes of others.
I want to preface what I’m about to share by stating that this post is in no way lauding or promoting perpetual singleness. I was born to be a wife and mother, and have spent my days as a single individual grooming and preparing myself for these honorable, amazing and highly demanding destiny-impacting roles. That said, I’d be lying if I did not share how thankful I am for my season of singleness. It has been a time of unbridled focus, learning and growth, as I’ve been able to focus all my life’s energies on what God has called me to do and in preparing for my future.
I find it tragic that many view being single as pitiable and undesirable; almost an anathema if you will. Singles in any gathering are the most likely to have invisible question marks surrounding them, “So what’s wrong with him?” or “Why doesn’t anyone want to be with her?” Many spend that time pining away for marriage or other romantic relationships or worse, throw themselves into every social scenario possible, in hopes of snagging the attention of an eligible potential spouse. While nothing is wrong with this, it more often turns out to be a fruitless or even dangerous venture for many. Several cave in to the unrelenting pressures of society and circumstances and eventually settle for less than God’s best for them, either through wrong marital choices, illicit sexual relationships, illicit sexual practices or other detrimental pathways.
My understanding of the Word of God suggests to me that singleness should be viewed in the following multi-dimensional lens:
- A passing season (Ecclesiastes 3:1-11) – just one snippet of your life’s story, a snapshot of your foundation-building and destiny-establishing life phase
- A fleeting state (Isaiah 40:6-8) – a particular condition in a specific season of your life; like everything else in the life of a believer who has handed his or her life over to God, it is not permanent, no matter how perpetual it feels …….
- A preparatory phase (2 Chronicles 27:6) – Jotham became mighty because he prepared his ways before God; he utilized his time wisely to obtain the best dividends in life. There is no time like the present, and there is no present like that which is unfettered by myriads of roles, responsibilities and ramifications. As a single person, you are the only person you are accountable to in terms of the use of your time ……. This is the time to get that new degree, write that book, trade that stock, set up that blog site, add on that certification, cultivate that healthy lifestyle, etc. ….. – while your time is still completely yours. When that spouse, child, mother-in-law, PTA meeting, family gathering, etc. comes into the picture, your time will no longer be yours ….. So view your current phase as a seed, an invitation to plant that from which you hope to reap bountiful dividends in the future ……
- A divine opportunity (Ephesians 5:16) – Singleness affords so many opportunities to redeem the time. I cannot tell you how grateful I am that I was single during the Covid-19 season. First of all, I was able to initiate about ten God-directed projects in quick succession, two of which would have taken about three to five years to accomplish professionally. This was because the lock-down eliminated a lot of local travel to and from work and various other activities that usually suck up so much time (I didn’t realize how much!). Redirecting all that time and energy to God-directed initiatives enabled confluent growth and progress in leaps and bounds, such as I had never seen in so short a duration! In another vein, my heart went out to friends and colleagues who were stuck in their homes with little children ……. As much as I love kids, these would not have been the circumstances in which I would have opted to be with them – having to keep them attentive and focused on school lessons, looking for creative ways to alleviate their boredom and restlessness, attempting to keep them entertained for such a protracted period – all I can say is that I’ve never been more grateful to NOT be a mom …. 🙂 And even if it were only a spouse one was dealing with, being stuck indoors for most of the day for several months may not be the most desirable way to enjoy one another’s company unless you’re both introverts or already work closely together all the time ….. Suffice it to say that I was very joyful in the God of my salvation …..! 🙂
- A romantic rendezvous … (Psalms 91:1) – I cannot tell you how greatly enriched and transformed my life has been by spending copious amounts of time alone with God. Dwelling in the secret place of the Most High has a way of grounding and establishing you in His presence, plans, purpose and person like nothing else can. Just as lots of time spent with a loved one leads to intimacy and deep bonding, the habitual practice of time spent alone with God brings you into a depth of knowledge and fellowship with Him that no human relationship can equal, granting you unparalleled peace and insurmountable joy and satisfaction, not to mention a maturity, stability and conformity to His image that transcends your natural years or abilities.
In a nutshell dear friends, singleness should be viewed as a priceless, timeless gift, one that will reap life-long dividends if you recognize and utilize its potential efficiently. Remember, the season is fleeting and offers ample singular opportunities you may never again encounter …. so go out there and singularly live it up!! 🙂